


we're just sunflowers waiting for a sunrise

by LittleMissAgrafina



Series: Comfortember 2020 [4]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Anxiety, But not heavy, Drawing, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Healthy Coping Mechanisms, Hurt/Comfort, Irondad, Just uncle Ben related, Michelle Jones Is a Good Bro, Peter Parker Feels, Peter Parker Gets a Hug, Peter Parker Has Anxiety, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Sunflowers, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Has A Heart, spiderson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:09:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27387718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleMissAgrafina/pseuds/LittleMissAgrafina
Summary: "Hey, Pete?" Tony's voice rang softly from where his chin was propped on top of the head resting on his shoulder."Hey, Mr. Stark?" Peter answered back, not moving.Grasping Peter's hand from where it was tucked into his waist while they cuddled, Tony gently pulled it free and turned it over, careful to watch for Peter tensing or stiffening. "I noticed these appearing a while ago." Tony's thumb subconsciously brushed over the edge of a green shape curling just around the bottom of Peter's wrist and palm. "I was just curious about it."---Comfortember Day 4. Anxiety
Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: Comfortember 2020 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995808
Comments: 38
Kudos: 369
Collections: Comfortember 2020





	we're just sunflowers waiting for a sunrise

**Author's Note:**

  * For [angxlsgrxce](https://archiveofourown.org/users/angxlsgrxce/gifts).



> I'm super excited about this one guys!!  
> It's built around a post on tumblr (here's a link if you want proper context or whatever: ) that I fell in love with a while ago and asked if I could write my own fic on. This particular work is a sort of prequel to the next part. I will be making a mini series for it, but it will probably only be 2 or 3 works in total.  
> Now, without further ado, I present to you the 4th day of Comfortember! Hope you guys like it! (Especially you angxlsgrxce:))
> 
> NOTE:  
> One last thing, there is a very very vague reference to self-harm but I think it's pretty blink and you miss it so I didn't tag it. I just wanted to give you all a heads up anyway though:) keep safe guys!

The first time he had seen it out of the corner of his eye, Tony had thought that maybe Peter had gotten a tattoo or something, possibly some of the typical teenage rebellion that Tony knew still lay inside Peter somewhere wanted to make a show. 

  
  


Tony hadn't noticed entirely at first. He had caught glimpses under Peter's sleeves, over his hands or wrists and even near his socks but when Peter would come back for his next lab day, those flashes of colour or shapes would be gone. And so the tattoo idea was dismissed.

  
  


Tony started keeping a close eye though, watching discreetly when Peter lifted his arm for something Tony knew would let his sleeves slide or when he would lift his legs and sit cross legged on his workbench stool. The older man was still baffled at how he sat that way on a stool but put it down to Peter's weird spideryness.

  
  


Throughout his watching and observing, Tony finally saw that the drawings, for that's what they had to be, would appear and disappear at random. Some days they would be there and other days not. As would they be large and more bold or more subtle and contained at times.

  
  


The only thing that Tony saw in connection with the drawings was Peter's fidgeting and jumpiness. Whenever those were increased more than Peter's usual energetic behaviour, Tony knew he would find drawings too.

  
  


Eventually his curiosity and slight worry became too much for the man and he had to ask about it. That time came to be during a movie night that he and Peter were having when the kid stayed for the weekend.

  
  


"Hey, Pete?" Tony's voice rang softly from where his chin was propped on top of the head resting on his shoulder.

  
  


"Hey, Mr. Stark?" Peter answered back, not moving.

  
  


Grasping Peter's hand from where it was tucked around his waist, Tony gently pulled it free and turned it over, careful to watch for Peter tensing or stiffening. "I noticed these appearing a while ago." Tony's thumb subconsciously brushed over the edge of a green shape curling just around the bottom of Peter's wrist and palm. "I was just curious about it."

  
  


"It's embarrassing." Peter mumbled into Tony's shirt.

  
  


Instead of pushing like his curiosity wanted him to, Tony spoke back quietly. "I'm sure it isn't but if you don't want to talk about it then it's okay, Pete. Don't make yourself speak about something that you aren't comfortable with talking about."

  
  


Peter was silent for a while and Tony could practically feel his mind turning.

  
  


"MJ likes to draw." Peter eventually said, his voice quiet and nervous yet open in a way that Tony hadn't heard before. 

  
  


"She says that it helps her feel calm and happy when something stressful is going on." Peter hesitated slightly here. "I was really…  _ anxious _ at school a while ago and she told me to try drawing but all the paper I had was for my classes so I couldn't use it and I didn't wanna ask MJ for some of her's– uhh, sorry. Rambling. So I just started drawing on my hands and stuff and the motion is really calming and soothing. Especially the feeling of the pen or marker. So, yeah." Peter finished a bit awkwardly but Tony didn't mind. He knew that Peter struggled with talking about his anxiety and other tendencies at times. He knew it because he still struggled himself at times.

  
  


"I'm really glad that this is something that helps you, Bug. It's really awesome that you found a healthy way to cope with it." Tony said to him, his voice oh so gentle and full of pride.

  
  


Peter looked up at him, slight confusion swirling in his eyes. "You are? Isn't it lame? Ya know, that drawing like that is what helps?" He didn't think that Tony would be against it obviously, he just hadn't thought the man would have thought it was the best because of the way it implicated that Peter still struggled with his self destructive tendencies.

  
  


"Of course I am!" Tony smiled at him. "This is so much better and healthier than so many alternatives and I'm really proud that you found something that works for you so well. And it's not lame, Pete, not at all.

  
  


Peter smiled bashfully at him and answered by ducking his head back to Tony's shoulder and cuddling into his side again. He subconsciously fidgeted with his sleeves, the cotton sliding up to show more of the colourful green vines curling around his wrist. Noticing Tony's curious but respectful glances, Peter took a deep breath before offering him his arm.

  
  


"You can look if you'd like. MJ sometimes does it for me but I did today's one." Peter said and Tony looked at him as if silently asking if he was sure. When Peter didn't move his arm away, the older man carefully tugged the sleeve higher and was met with bright yellows and greens drawn across Peter's arm. 

  
  


It was a sunflower, and an exquisite one at that. It's leaves and stem curling and twisting behind and over the vibrant yellow petals.

  
  


"It's beautiful." Tony said quietly, his words drifting into the comfortable silence that had grown around them.

  
  


"Thank you." The words came equally as softly.

  
  
  


\---

  
  
  


A couple weeks later, Peter was sitting at his workstation in the lab, trying to do homework. Or rather, fidgeting and twisting at it. He couldn't sit still, but he couldn't move. Couldn't calm the tingling feeling of his anxiety from where it was centred in his chest.

  
  


Tony eventually stopped what he was doing and rolled his chair next to Peter's. "You okay, kid? I can feel your anxiety from my desk." There was concern in his eyes that cracked the part of Peter that usually brushed things off, saying he was fine.

  
  


"I can't calm down. I dunno… today just hasn't been a great day. I'm sorry." 

  
  


"Hey, shh. You're okay, it's fine." Tony tried to soothe him. "You do your breathing exercises? The  _ 5 things _ countdown?" At Peter's nod he spoke again. "And drawing? Have you done that yet?"

  
  


Peter shook his head miserably. "My hands are a bit shaky. I don't like doing it while they're like that and MJ wasn't at school today."

  
  


Tony hummed to himself. "Okay. If uh, if you're comfortable with it, I can draw for you? I mean, I won't be as good as MJ or you but I'm passable. I've sketched enough graphics and designs over this to be pretty decent at it." The older man rambled slightly, sounding similar to Peter when he spoke a lot.

  
  


The trembling yet still blinding smile he received from the teenager was more than enough to calm Tony's own slight nerves at his sudden offer. 

  
  


"You'd do that for me?"

  
  


"Of course. I'd do anything for you."  _ Whoops. Too much, Tony. Don't scare the kid away dammit. _

  
  


Peter pretended not to hear the last part of what Tony said, seeing the slight panic on his face after saying it and knowing that the man wouldn't want massive attention brought to it. It still made Peter's heart feel happy that his dad- mentor cared for him so much.

  
  


"I have some markers in my bag, I can go get th-" Peter started saying before Tony interrupted him.

  
  


"No need, bud. I have a couple packs lying around somewhere."  _ Yeah, cuz Tony Stark just has packs of Sharpie lying around. Sharpies that you conveniently bought the day after Peter told you about this. _

  
  


In a few minutes, they had migrated up to the living room, sat together on the couch with Peter slumped against Tony's side and an arm resting on his lap. 

  
  


Markers next to him, Tony nudging Peter. "What do ya want, kid? Are we feeling something Picasso or Van Gough?" He snickered at his joke.

  
  


Peter turned uncharacteristically quiet, and Tony could feel a weight in his next words. "Can you draw a sunflower?"

  
  


"Yeah, I can do that." 

  
  


They fell quiet and Tony felt a subtle shift between them when he drew the first of the yellow petals. And as he drew, the flower bloomed, it's petals and leaves growing, brightening as it came to life.

  
  


Placing a cap back on the final marker a while later, Tony tilted his head and carefully studied Peter's face. The teen was marginally calmer than earlier, his tremors gone and his shoulders relaxed.

  
  


Suddenly he turned his head and looked Tony in the eyes. "The last person who drew me a sunflower was Uncle Ben." He blurted and Tony was momentarily stunned.

  
  


"He used to paint a lot, and his favourite thing to paint was sunflowers. I still remember the first time he started teaching me about art. The way he showed me how to layer the petals. It just brought it back a bit. Thank you for bringing a piece of him back to me." Peter whispered.

  
  


"Thank you for letting me." Tony whispered back. His heart bursting at what Peter had just told him, what Peter had trusted him with.

  
  


It was funny how things worked that way, how something as small as a sunflower could hold such meaning. 

  
  


Something changed with Peter and Tony that day, something shifted and brought them closer. A part of Peter that had felt empty ever since the night that he and May lost Ben finally felt as if it was being healed. 

  
  


Peter's uncle would always have a place in his heart, would always be special to him, but another place in Peter's heart had grown. That place was Tony's.

  
  


Tony knew that Ben was, and still is, important to Peter. A part of him that was still so strong. Tony promised that he would help Peter keep that part of him alive, help it to grow and not be forgotten on the days where the flowers were deprived of sun. Benjamin Parker would be a part of Peter as long as time still passed, Tony was adamant of it.

  
  


Ben would be found in the curling of a sunflowers petals, in the twisting green of its leaves and stem, but Tony, well, he was becoming the sun that helped it thrive.

  
  
  
  



End file.
